do I have a screen addiction?

Recent musings at L'Abri have led me to wonder whether or not I may have an unfair (or maybe unhealthy) preference for screen-based media. Though I think it's important to avoid demonizing different forms of media and communication, I also have noticed that I've been especially formed and informed by screen-based communication, which includes everything from movies to TV to--of course--my precious computer and the e-mails that come to me through it.

L'Abri has pretty strong opinions about watching TV or movies on your laptop outside of a structured time in which the entire community pulls together to do so. So on Wednesday nights we have movie night, and if you want, you can put 2sf in the kitty to watch one of the movies from our collection. The movies are almost always "high quality," but in the past I've often found them to fall into the "good-but-a-serious-downer" category (ie, "Amistad". Seriously; who can watch that movie and not be out of commission for the rest of an evening?). So sometimes I avoid the films the workers choose to put on the projector on Wednesdays because I find that so often I'm on big-idea overload from the rest of life here. In that situation I'd rather just stare out a window for a couple of hours.

That's the other thing: I happen to LOVE the passivity of watching television. When you're living in an environment that demands your attention and emotional energy around every corner (and I believe that's a good thing), sometimes you just want to "check out" for the sake of giving your head a rest. I think this is why law students become alcoholics and med students hook up all the time on the weekends. Law school and med school are stressful enough; who wants to watch "House" or have serious philosophical debates on the side? Anyway, tv, casual sex, and booze all offer escapes to people who're looking for a little stress relief.

On the other hand, I think we sell ourselves short on what we can handle mentally and emotionally. I often felt at school that my departments could've been a lot more challenging and demanding within reason, and it really isn't too much to ask for a community to agree not to watch TV as a form of release. Anyway, L'Abri's policy on tv-watching is a good thing too because it challenges the people who are living here to be open to other forms of media and communication and to regain sensitivity to screen-based stuff in places we might've lost it. So it encourages us to let go of our dependency and at the same time to become smarter at engaging with it. Also, hopefully, it offers the opportunity to get more creative in finding ways to be recreational. We have a heckuva view, after all, and no end of fantastic walks and hikes to offer right from our front door.

Maybe it's just that I find the beauty a little overwhelming sometimes, and want to shield myself from it. Seriously; that might be it.